How to maintain love with parents after marriage? (For Indian Boys)

Dear All,

One of my friends once told me that if you want to increase (or maintain) the love with your parents after your marriage you must live in a separate house, maybe in same city.

My immediate though was "what kind of logic is this". How can our parents love us more, while we cannot be part of their day to day work, they are aged now, and need us more at this point of their life. Our parents have done a lot for us, and it is the time for us to repay.

With time, after facing some situations I could see some logic in my friend’s words. I also remembered an old saying which goes like "Distance makes the heart grow fonder". Actually I realized that staying too close for too long may actually damage the relation, I guess it applies in all relations. Even my dog loved me more when I came back from a long tour. Considering these, I think my friend was right, it do seem that some distance is healthy and we must get separated to preserve the love with our parents.

However I still have some hitches in mind:-

1. How can we take care of our parents when we are away, we may be in the same city but sometimes and emergency gives lesser time than time we may require to reach our parents

2. Isn't there a risk of losing any love which is still left. I think yes

3. To whom will we turn during some common tiffs between husband and wife? Without control they may aggravate to serious situations?


There are no easy answers. Like I do for all my problems, I googled (Searched on Google) "How to maintain love with parents" and found some interesting advices, there was one from Reader's Digest website(http://www.rd.com/family/maintain-a-healthy-relationship-with-your-parents/). They have suggested a) considering your parents as fellow adults, like your friends, b) Keep your sense of humour c) Tell them what bothers you and most interesting d) Don't ask your parents advice unless you really want it.

Okay, we can consider our parents as friends, what if they do not let us do so, and take anything we do with this regards as an insult? What if, our sense of humour is not well taken by them? and What if they expect us to take advice in every small matter (like if you should order samosa or not?..:) etc.) or they keep giving their advice in each matter without asking for it, and feel insulted if we do not take their advice?

I feel after a certain age our parents actually become like little kids, only way more stubborn and difficult to deal with.


So overall the issue remains unsolved.

I wish to know how common are these differences with parents in our country? Are you facing it? What is the best solution to these situations?

Please give your views.

Yours sincerely


Saurabh